Tag Archives: meditation

I can’t relaaaaax, I’m anxious!

19 Jan

meditating

For years, yoga instructors have told me to ‘relaaaaax’. Massage therapists have told me to ‘relaaaaax’. And yesterday, a new friend who’s training me in a new sport (I’ll tell you all about that once I’ve pitched the magazine story about it) told me that to truly master the technique, I needed to ‘relaaaaax’.

I know this. I’m aware of the tension in my shoulders and neck. Aware I look worried a lot of the time.

But I just can’t relaaaaax!

Meditation, massage, yoga, willing myself to chill out…they all feel incredible at the time, but then I go back to being tense.

So what’s the deal?

I’ve realised it’s not tension, it’s anxiety.

That’s a tough thing to admit. Moi? Anxious? Quelle horreur!

But yes, it’s there.

Apparently when I was 8, I ran home in tears and told my mum, “I’m not going to pass the TEE!” The TEE are university entrance exams. That you take in year 12. Yup, I was anxious about something 8 years away.

Walking into a room full of people has always terrified me. Searching for a friend in a crowded cafe or bar makes me nervous. No idea why. That’s anxiety for you. And being a sensitive soul. 🙂

So rather than focusing on relaaaaxing, I’m going to address my anxiety.

I’ve no idea how, but the search starts now.

Do you have any tips for treating anxiety (naturally)? Would love to hear your thoughts…

Today I…say yes

15 Mar

‘No’ can be such a naughty word. I’ve noticed that I say it quite a lot. No to an impromptu dinner invitation, no to the gym, no to my alarm when it bleeps incessantly for me get up and meditate or do yoga. It’s just so easy to say no (except when I’m offered a Tim Tam).

‘No’ doesn’t require any effort, any risk. But a life without risk means a life without rewards.

A few months ago, an old school friend mentioned she was throwing herself back into travel and asked if I would like to join her in India in July. Immediately I said no. A million excuses raced through my mind: ‘I won’t be able to get the time off, I won’t be able to afford it, India is scary, I might get mugged, my hair will go frizzy, it’s easier to just stay at home in my normal routine and let everyone else gallivant around the world, they don’t have Tim Tams there…’

Two days ago, she asked me again. ‘Come and meet me in India in July. I’ll be taking photographs and wandering the streets. You could come along and write.’

YES!

Why the heck shouldn’t I just say YES? Yes to throwing myself in the deep end. Yes to leaving my life behind and seeing what awaits me in one of the world’s spiritual hubs. Yes to opening my heart and my journal and seeing what flows forth. Yes to frizzy hair! YES!

I’m ready to get real, to get raw and to descend on a foreign land and see where it sweeps me.

I’m ready to live!

What have you said yes to today?

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